Week 7- Sexual Intimacy

In class this week we covered a very heavy topic. Mainly for the fact that there are so many views on sexual intimacy. Being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, it is a topic that we hold very sacred. We are commanded and covenant to not participate in sexual relations to those we are not legally married to. The law of chastity is a law that member covenant to keep remaining worthy in the eyes of God.  From the gospel library, “Chastity is sexual purity. Those who are chaste are morally clean in their thoughts, words, and actions. Chastity means not having any sexual relations before marriage. It also means complete fidelity to husband or wife during marriage.” By this definition we understand that sexual intimacy is much more than sexual intercourse and can often begin to enter the mind long before any actions take place. 

BYU and BYUI have been the rolling joke of the nation among young single adults for creating new terms and participating in many different activities that are justifications to keeping the law of chastity. Durfing and soaking have been among the most used terms to describe actions that are taking place among many individuals with others, partners or not. Durfing is defined on urban dictionary as, “The act of dry humping through clothes while making out.” Using the same dictionary soaking is defined as, “to place your penis in a girls vagina, and not move in and out.” Due to the increased use of these terms and the overarching popularity of them, it is leading member, young single adults to believe that is a very common practice and that it is acceptable to participate in. The act of sexual intimacy is something that is personal between partners and Heavenly Father many recognize that the definition of the law of chastity stated above is the most correct to follow and when done will aid in decreased feelings of guilt. 

Through many church leaders we can more fully understand the sacredness of the powers of procreation given to mankind from the days of Adam and Eve. When respected and used correctly it is able to protect the sacred channel is authorized by marriage between a man and a woman in which premortal spirits living with God enter mortality. As people stay true to this they are blessed and are able to feel the blessing of participating in one of the most exalted powers from God given to his children. 

Scientifically we also understand that there are a lot of different things happening for the power of procreation to take place. Things can also be done to enhance sexual intimacy within a marriage and aide in the increased attachment of partners when understanding the process of the body when participating in such acts. 

 

Above are three different models that we can use to better understand the physiology of the body during sexual arousal. On the far left we see that males have the excitement, plateau and then orgasm followed by a resolution or refractory period in which emotions are settled and further actions in most cases cannot take place. When looking at the female graph in the middle we see that women stay in the plateau phase for much longer before reaching climax and if desired could reach climax multiple times. Another path shows that they go through excitement and then plateau up and down in a steady feeling of tension without a release of that tension from a climax and only meats resolution after time. Unlikely but it could also be that they follow the males more closely and are able to climax as similar times. In the diagram to the far left when interpreted we see that women must psychologically allow their bodies to continue to the response of sexual stimuli. It is not as automatic and before true arousal if a way this allow their body to continue the cycle. 

The biggest thing that I learned is the importance of communication and understanding. Learning what the other person desires and finding a way to fulfill the needs of both partners in compromise will promote a healthy sex life. Also, an interesting fact that was shared was that on average only 10-20% of women will reach climax during penis-vagina sex. This is important to know so that feeling of not being good enough or thinking that wives are not attracted to their husband are not felt. Ultimately this should be an act to show love and bring partners together and can best be done in honest communication.